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I would like to apologize to anyone I have not yet offended. Please be patient. I will get to you shortly.

Lmao it'd be hard not to laugh at that but also sock you in the face at the same time

I am going to put the cape on me next time i get mad . and when he asks, I will tell him I am Super Mad. Sounds like a great way to laugh and make up. If it doesn't work, I will stick my tongue out at him.

Give it to 'em GOOD.

50 Comebacks Will Leave Them SPEECHLESS (& And Make YOU Laugh)

Sometimes people just need to hear it. Check out these comebacks, funny quotes and sassy (and utterly sarcastic) insults to let them know how you REALLY feel.

Bad muthafucka

I'd rather have Samuel L. Jackson narrative my life. No offense, Morgan Freeman. my life just requires multiple uses of the word motherfucker.


i always mean what I say quote quotes funny funny quote funny quotes humor lol

Your opinion belongs between fuck this & fuck that!

Hmmmmm I'm going to file your opinions right here between fuck this and fuck that / quotes / wise words


An apple a day will keep the doctor away, but eating 2 it will just kill you. My words of wisdom cause I choose chips over apples any day.

Learn to let go of these weights in your life, be mature, and DON'T feed into them!

You will never be truly happy if you continuously hold onto the things that make you sad. So focusing on things that make me happy!

Dear life, please stop.

Dear life, I have a complete grasp on the fact that you are not fair. So please stop teaching me that lesson.


Yes, penguins do have knees! A penguin’s leg is composed of a short femur, knee, tibia and fibula. The upper leg bones are not visible as they are covered in feathers, giving the penguin the illusion of short legs and no knees. No go the fuck to sleep.


SO TRUE! But the sad thing is that my life is boring and I realize how bad it is.