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that sounds like me. choked on a piece of peanut butter fudge and after I spat it I thought "didn't like peanut butter anyway"

Gonna be me in public one day

Sign for home minibar - The Officer Said, "You Drinking" I Said,"You Buying" We Just Laughed and Laughed. I Need Bail Money wood Sign Funny Alcohol Sign.

Things I have in common with...

Meet the 2016 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show models Things I have in common with the Victorias Secret models: Being hungry

Every day!!

That horrifying moment when you realize you're the most adult adult in the room.

Wait, what did you just say? MY WHOLE LIFE IS A LIE

So apparently the numbers on the toaster are minutes? For the last 24 years I thought it was different levels of toastyness. Technically it is different levels of toastyness, because how ever let my you put it for determines how toasty it will be!

You know that moment when you close a cupboard and hear something fall? That's the sound of someone else's problem.

Then Karma smacks you in face and you.end up being the next person to open it