Well it seems a little oxymoronish to Kill and be Kind at the same time.but being kind is the right thing to do, maybe instead of killing them they will learn to be kind also, or just be kind in return. The Golden Rule if you will.
Self-confidence is the best outfit, rock it and own it. Parents think if they give their children everything they want, they're doing them good. Instead teach them how to have self-confidence. That will take them much farther in life.