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Free and Funny News Ecard: 2 of my fb friends got married this weekend and 9 posted pictures of their babies. I slept in all weekend and didn't have a use for pants on Sunday. I win.

And all the people said, Amen!

Funny Christmas Season Ecard: It just isn't Christmas unless you push your body to the brink of alcholism and diabetes.

OMG!  Too funny!!!

Yep :) and look pretty especially pretty when I'm blacked out drunk laughing at dead puppies yeah pretty real and pretty photoshop

We hate everyone funny quotes quote bitch hate funny quotes girl quotes @Meg Christensen bahahaha!!

Why are we so unpopular? Because we hate everyone.yup, pretty much sums it up.

Funny Apology Ecard: Oh you have a cold? How rude of me. I just laid an egg and now my body is violently ripping down the walls of my uterus. But can I get you a tissue? My life it's not even funny

LOL!!  I need this sign in my house!!!  I LOVE EXERCISE!  just not as much as I love wine... or my friends, or sitting on my ass... or a combination of any of the above... never mind.

21 Lies You Tell On A First Date

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: I LOVE EXERCISE! Just not as much as I love wine. or my friends. or sitting on my ass. or a combination of any of the above.never mind.

Wouldn't it be SO great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free ...and three sizes smaller? | Confession Ecard

This is how i feel at work when i answer the phone :) Listen bitch, I'm being as polite as I possibly can.

I don't want to be a grown up anymore. It's not nearly as much fun as it was supposed to be.

Funny Confession Ecard: I don't want to be a grown up anymore. It's not nearly as much fun as it was supposed to be.

I wonder if Heaven is  like being at Target by yourself with a Starbucks in hand with endless amounts of cash  in your envelope...

I wonder if heaven is like Target and Starbucks? I believe this is the White Girl's version of Heaven!

funny pictures - funny quotes - I just ran my first marathon this morning

Just kidding I'm on my cupcake. Just kidding I hate cupcakes. Just kidding I live for cupcakes. Just kidding I live for veggies. Just kidding veggies make me sick. Just kidding millennials make me sick.

And you don't know what it does either?  Or who ordered the original prescription?  Or what your dose is?  I'm shocked.

Or who ordered the original prescription? Or what your dose is? I'm shocked. Sounds like everyday at our job.

Sometimes I wonder what she has that I don't. And then I realize, probably herpes. | Breakup Ecard | someecards.com

Funny Breakup Ecard: Sometimes I wonder what she has that I dont. And then I realize, probably herpes.

London Eye - I crossed this off my list in 2005 with one of my best friends in the world.

Free and Funny Friendship Ecard: Bring on the warmer temperatures! Oh wait. I'm too fat for summer right now.

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