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Pumps a glob of soap, rinses it right down the drain. "All clean, Mommy!" #friyay

Ahh the days of being young and well-rested. Welp, thanks for ruining my day again, Timehop. #momlife

26 Things That Piss Off Your Waitress

Yeah, I did this a few times. 'Cause, ya know, I'll totally make the rest of the restaurant uncomfortable to please your dumb butt!

Burn. I thought we were friends, child to whom I gave life.

The mom-brain struggle is real. #momlife @scarymommy @fromthebottomofmypurse @mommywinetime

See this Instagram photo by @stamfordmommy • 100 likes