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No no no...YOU made the mistake of misunderstanding what i was saying...dumbass.

YOU made the mistake of misunderstanding what i was saying.

It’s not that I’m shy…

People who feel this is true got it wrong! Its not that your shy or won't talk to people! It's that most people won't talk to you! You have a very unfriendly personality! People stay away!

Misanthropy

Free and Funny News Ecard: I skip Black Friday because my hatred for mankind outweighs my love for stuff.

oh my... so true.

I was just telling my kids that we had to square dance in PE when I was in high school (Thank God we did that cuz I NEVER used that a day in my life after that).they were like, "what's square dancing?

Apps on iPhone

Free and Funny Flirting Ecard: Whenever I delete an app on my iPhone, the shaking icons make me feel that they're panicked over who's getting cut from the team.

Algebra

hmmmm, and yet another day has passed and I did not use Algebra once.very interesting. If I counted all the times I've used algebra you would know how many math tests I've taken.

Do you have a problem with the company because it's outsourcing jobs to developing countries, or are you just too "patriotic" to speak to someone with a foreign accent?

Seriously - why do I have to press 1 for english at all.how about press 1 for NOT english!

That moment when you realize your children have your twisted sense of humor... And you don't know whether to be proud or scared!

The Joke’s on Mom

>>> so freaking true! Don't know whether to be proud or scared that both of my kids got my twisted sense of humor - sometimes better (or worse) than the norm. One thing is for sure, they are their mom's kids *wink*

like for the next week would be nice # introvertproblems # exhausted

I just want to hibernate, yep, I know, your mouth is hanging open at the thought of me not wanting to be with people. I just want to hibernate

click my flip flops together and get to the beach Dorothy Wizard of Oz

I always tell my patients that they have 18 whole years to bond with their child...32 if they screw it up!

SO TRUE! Parents please start being parents. This world is full of selfish people and kids thinking they are entitled to EVERYTHING! If you are going to have kids, then be the parent, not the friend!

Mmhm.

Free and Funny Friendship Ecard: You're ridiculous. And by that I mean, we are going to best friends.

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The Importance of Listening, Cognition, and Comprehension

Quality friends over quantity, always. It's not even a matter of (whose "better" or who's "worse") just feel content, fulfilled, and grateful for every breath you are given.

To my daughters

Bwahahahahha LOVE it! lol Dear Daughters, Should I ever learn you've been twerking anywhere, at any time, I will learn to do it myself and make sure I chaperon every single dance you ever go to. except that it is spelled "chaperone.

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